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I’m Flying Somewhere Over Kansas, I Think

The play date with the Pitts was lovely. Our children swapped adoption war stories, while Angelina and I barely picked at our spinach and avocado salads. Jon and Brad discussed how difficult it is trying to carry on normal lives while being known as “The Sexiest Man Alive”—something only the two of them really get. I kept giving Brad “the look.” The one that says, “I still can’t believe what you did to Jen.”

I’m just messing with ya…we didn’t really hook up with Brad and Angelina. I was, however, on a mission to see someone—ANYONE—famous in our trip through The City of Angels.

We walked along Hollywood Blvd and looked at the stars on the sidewalk. I honestly didn’t know where to focus my attention: on the stars or on the freaks who were dressed in costumes wanting to hug my kids. And then pay them money for the hug. Thanks, but no thanks.

Here’s me getting as close to George Clooney’s hands as fate will ever allow. (sigh)

We drove along Rodeo Drive. We opted not to actually get out and walk there, once we assessed the damage that three small children could possibly do in a boutique where the merchandise mark-up is somewhere in the vicinity of 300%. Plus, by the last day, we had done-spent all our cash at the Happiest Place on Earth.

(I think that must be the slogan for the Disneyland merchants who can charge whatever the heck they want for an item with mouse ears on it…and people will buy it.)

Back in Hollywood, I literally walked with my camera in hand looking for anyone remotely famous, just to say I did. Where are all the famous people on a Saturday afternoon, anyway? I can tell you where they are NOT: Hollywood Blvd at the Mongolian Grill eating lunch

or in front of the Beverly Hills sign taking family pictures.

As luck would have it, we stopped for a potty break in Beverly Hills—and might I just add right here, those were THE most PLUSH gas station potties I’ve ever set my heiny upon. As Jon and the kids picked out snacks and beverages for the breath-taking drive along the Pacific Ocean, from Santa Monica to Malibu…

I ran across the street to the little coffee shop on the corner. And lo and behold, at long last…I spotted my famous person.

That’s right. Seated in a small table for two, enjoying her java while chatting with a friend was Tia. Or Tamara. I’m not sure which one. Actually, now that I see this picture, I’m thinking it was Tamara…the one on the right.

But I know it was one of them. Of course at that moment, and that moment only, I had neither my camera nor my family witnesses.

I’m pretty sure she motioned for me to join her, but I played it cool. I politely declined, explaining that my family was taking a potty break across the street and going ga ga over the plush facilities. But maybe I’d catch her next time, when I go on my God Speaks book tour.

I’m lying about the invitation.

I then made my way back to the car in my best Beverly Hills strut, feeling as if my life was complete. Famous person sighted. Mission accomplished.

Jon and I decided that after my God Speaks series hits the NY Times best seller list, he can retire and we can buy a little beach house in Malibu. I could seriously get used to the ocean for my front yard and the mountains for my back yard. And that WEATHER!!! Wow!

Of course, if the book thing doesn’t pan out, we could always get into the spray paint business. It must be huge in L.A., as I have never seen so much graffiti in my entire life. Literally, on every square foot of cement along the expressway, were gang symbols. How do people paint all those fancy-multicolored designs without getting caught? And if you are that talented, why are you not doing something more productive with your life besides painting bridges?

I mean, you could be dressing up like Jack Sparrow and asking my kids to give you a high five on Hollywood Blvd! Or selling water at Disneyland for $4.00 a bottle. The possibilities in L.A. are ENDLESS! And they are evidentally paying quite well, judging from the number of women I’ve seen who had “work” done. If you know what I mean. That surgery ain’t cheap, man!

Well, speaking of my God Speaks series, I will be back with a new post once I get home, get unpacked and get everyone back on Eastern Standard Time. In that post I will announce the winner of the Title Contest and the Drawing for the $25 Target Gift Card.

Remember, for each title suggestion I will enter your name once for the drawing. There’s still time!! And I have to tell you, y’all are blowing me away with your suggestions! They are AWESOME. I have several favorites. It’s going to be hard choosing only one.

I miss you all and can’t wait to get back into the blogging groove. God’s been speaking a lot to me lately, and I can’t wait to share.

And last but certainly not least, Happy Father’s Day to the two best Fathers in the world: My Dad and My Husband. I wouldn’t be half the person I am today without your love, provision, loyalty and balance. I love you both sooooooo much.

7 Comments

  2. I'm glad I'm not the only one that i would be giving Brad the evil eye for what he did to Jenn! I'm still hung up on that. I suppose I should move on.

    Sounds like you had a fabulous trip!!!

    Reply

  4. Great to see your blog pop up in my reader again! I just had to laugh at your son's expression on the family picture at "the happiest place on earth."

    LOVE the dress, btw.

    Reply

  6. Oh Sandy, I have missed you lately! It looks like you were having a great time. I love the CA coast and could live there anytime. BTW, I should have mentioned to you that my cousin's wife is the manager of the Ralph Lauren shop on Rodeo Drive! She's so cute and petite and runs the joint. LOL.

    Greg and I both would love to get a place with a view of the ocean one day. It doesn't have to be a mansion either; a shack would do. Just give me a view of that gorgeous ocean. Do you believe we live in landlocked Phoenix?

    Reply

  7. You guys look like you had an amazing trip – AND you looked AMAZING in that dress!

    I've been MIA lately too. I've been on vacation since Saturday and can't seem to get the urge to get on my blog (until now that is).

    Talk to you again soon.

    Reply

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