I don’t get Twitter. I mean, I know what it is, but I don’t get why people do it…or more specifically, why people read it. No offense, but unless there is some sort of medical emergency so critical that I need an hour by hour update on your condition, no need to update me hour by hour, thankyouverymuch.
Now Facebook. Facebook I get. In the few short months since I’ve joined The Facebook Club, I’ve reconnected with 225 friends, and counting. I can’t think of any other venue through which I’d be able to accomplish this in my lifetime. To have my childhood best friend, my former co-workers, my sister, a kid I babysat when I was 19, and my neighbors (from every house I’ve ever lived in ) all in one place at the same time is nothing short of an internet miracle.
In my real day-to-day life, I consider myself to have done really well if I’ve had one adult conversation every couple days. And those conversations are usually with the check out people at Kroger and Target, having something to do with something I’ve purchased or something cute (or not so cute) my child has done. No lie.
I’ve practically given up on actually inviting a friend over or-heaven help me- going OUT with a friend. At least until Fall 2012 when Elliana starts kindergarten. But who’s counting?
So Facebook has been an answer to this isolated-stay-at-home-momma’s prayers. In between loads of laundry, carpool and homework, I can hop on line and strike up a 2-minute conversation with any one of my 225 friends. And it doesn’t even have to make sense! Oh, the beauty of it all!
I mean, seriously…where else can I get 42 comments after I ask the question: “What ever happened to Prell?”
And blogging. Obviously, blogging I get. And if you are reading this, you probably get it too. In one fail swoop I can get my reading AND my writing fix in Little. Short. Bits.
I can leave quickie- comments.
I can skim and scan.
No long-term commitment.
Come and go as I please.
Oh, and the absolute THRILL when my Facebook World and my Blogging World collide. It’s almost more excitement than I can handle.
This morning before anyone else woke up, I sat down on my back deck along with the thousands of birds who reside in my backyard, to spend some time with God . Honestly, I was a little frustrated. Not with God, but with myself. It had been awhile since I sat on my deck to pray. A LONG while—I’m ashamed to admit.
See, I fully expected God to speak to me in enormous and profound ways this past week while I was at the beach. To sort of make up for all the times the last few months I haven’t spent time Him. You know…sort of a “catch up” time. After all, God always speaks to me at the beach. I take an hour walk each morning, and God speaks to me. Period. I have a lot of questions, and I need a lot of answers. God’s got the answers. It’s simple.
But as the days rolled along at the beach, I failed to hear much of anything at all. Except static. Very annoying.
So I sat quietly and started reading and meditating on the things of God this morning, and I heard God say to me,
“I miss you.”
And in an instant, I got it. I heard God and I understood in a microsecond what He was really saying to me.
In the last several months, little by little, I have abbreviated my prayer time. It wasn’t on purpose. Things got busy. Didn’t go as planned. Sick kid, dirty house, tired mom, blog blog blog, blah blah blah…
Little by little, I exchanged deep intimacy with my Heavenly Father for a prayer life of Twitter Talk and Facebook Status Updates.
“God help me today.”
“Thank you for my kids.”
“What should I say to this person?”
“God, I’m confused.”
“Lord, help me enjoy this day.”
“Speak to me, Lord.”
“Thank you for our house, our car and the sun.”
Little. Short. Bits
Skim and Scan.
Come and go as I please.
No long term commitments.
And no intimacy, whatsoever.
Certainly, God wants me to talk to Him all day about everything. Nothing wrong with that. But my Twitter Talk ultimately replaced the hours I used to sit down and soak in God’s presence and consume His word. And, boy, have I suffered for it. Not in the way you may think. God wasn’t over me chastising and punishing me.
Instead, over the last few months, I’ve groped, wandered and complained. I’ve felt anxiety, uncertainty and fear. I’ve allowed my heart to go unguarded, while impurities crept in, giving way to sin. My thinking has been scattered. I’ve struggled with hearing God clearly…or hearing Him at all. All as a direct result of ignoring God’s call to draw near to Him…to go deeply in Him.
“The Sovereign Lord has spoken to me, and I have listened. I do not rebel and turn away. Therefore, I have set my face like a stone, determined to do His will. And I know I will triumph.” Isaiah 50:5,7
I am still determined to do God’s will. After all, this is still my Year of Yes. But in order to do God’s will, I must know God’s will. And in order to know God’s will, I must spend time with God.
Therefore, beginning anew today, I am not going to worry about how everything else will get done…the kids, the housework, the book proposals. There is always too much to get done in any one day, anyway. Instead, I will set my alarm each morning and seek God first…
“I will hurry without lingering to obey your commands.” (Psalm 119:60)
…knowing that when I do this, God will see to it that I am equipped to complete every single thing within His will for me.
You realize what this means, don’t you? I’m starting out my summer vacation (aka, now I can SLEEP IN!!) with a commitment to get out of bed each day by way of the alarm clock. If you know me, you know that is HUGE.
I know this is not some great revelation, praying first thing in the morning.
“In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.” (Psalm 5:3)
But even in my zeal to hear God’s voice and teach others to do the same, I have forgotten the importance of this spiritual discipline. I have forgotten that true intimacy with God requires time and commitment. I have forgotten that my relationship with Jesus—the depth of relationship I desire, anyway—cannot exist on 200-character interactions.
I’m so thankful God doesn’t let me stray too far before He woos me back in.
Speaking of relationships, I think I’ll actually call a friend on the phone and make some plans for lunch this week.