1. Sandy,
    I think expectations are serious and we should make sure we deal with them because they do affect our relationships tremendously. I wrote these ideas down about expectations a few weeks ago:

    We all have expectations

    People are not privy to what our expectations are

    Our spouses or loved ones should not be expected to know what our expectations are unless they have been clearly communicated

    Expectations are not requirements in relationships

    Expectations are not rights

    Unmet expectations led to bitterness, and frustrations and a degrading of the relationship

    It takes work to understand another persons expectations

    It takes courage to tell someone they have not met your expectations

    Expectations should be discussed regularly if appropriate

    Writing down expectations can help clarify them

    Expectations are part of all of our relationships

    Work with those you love on what your expectations are and work to understand theirs as well. It will have great benefits.

    1. Great insights! I would add that many times, we aren’t even aware we had an expectation until someone fails to meet it. Ooohhh…that would make a great tweet. (you will see this again!)

  2. So true, so true. I’m just now learning this lesson. I spent far too much time building a lot of anger and resentment. Now, when I feel anger bubbling up, I ask myself is it legitimate. Did that person know what I wanted? If not, it isn’t their fault but mine for creating unrealistic expectations. It is a hard lesson to learn in our ‘me’ society.

    1. And it goes both ways, don’t you think? I mean how many times do we find someone angry or disappointed in us and we have no idea why? Unmet, unspoken expectations.

    1. Well, OK…maybe a little. 🙂 But I have to admit, when I expect things to be too much like heaven, I set myself up for disappointment. In heaven, my family will always help me clean up the kitchen, for example. ha!

  3. This so reminds me of when the twins were infants and I had 4 kids ages 3 and under, which I birthed myself. My best days in the midst of the chaos were when I decided in the mornings that I was going to get nothing done except be with my kids. Having 3 kids in diapers and 2 of them taking bottles every few hours, that took up a lot of my day. Then if I got anything done, like the dishes or some laundry, that was just a bonus and I could tell myself I had a productive day.

    1. Amy, I’ve been reconnected with you all these years and I had no idea your kids were that close in age! Wow. Hats off to you!!!!!!! I agree. Those baby/toddler years are unusually trying where days almost NEVER go as planned. I clearly remember on the day I would go to the grocery store, I’d have to keep telling myself, “This is all I’m going to get done today…just going to the grocery store and getting the food put away. That’s it. For the entire day. And that is reasonable and perfectly OK.”

      I’m not very far removed from those years, but I do NOT miss the chaos of them at all. 🙂

  4. The Max Lucado statement was enough to knock me right down!

    I expect all the things I normally get done in a day to still somehow be completed even when I am not here because I’ve got other commitments. Finally, this morning I told myself that I simply can’t be the only person on the planet with wrinkly (but clean!) laundry in the basket and various items stacked up that need to be put away. And somehow people manage to be okay;)

    Now, if I can translate that mood/attitude to actual people and not just things, I may be on the right track:)

    1. I totally understand. Most days I feel like I’m the ONLY person who has housework to do! Why is that??? One thing I’ve been doing lately is feeling like I can add things to my schedule without removing anything else. Like my abilities are limitless. And then I get really frustrated when I can’t get it all done.

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