Just Catching Up
If you are looking for something spiritual today, um…I’m sorry. Most of this is completely irrelevant and incoherent. How’s that for an intro? I’ve been in “teacher mode” on this blog so much lately, I feel like we just need to sit down with a cup of coffee and catch up on all the personal stuff. I’m actually drinking water right now, but I can order coffee for you. Alrighty then, got your beverage of choice? Here we go:
1. After a year of having a team of ladies come in to do my deep cleaning every two weeks, I made the difficult decision to let them go. It wasn’t actually a difficult decision. I had been leaning toward it for quite some time. See, we originally hired them because we were getting ready to put our house on the market and I knew I’d end up on prescription doses of Valium if I had to keep my house “show ready” with 3 kids. When I only had 2 kids (ages 5 and2) and we were selling our house in Florida, (before the housing market croaked) we showed our house EVERY. SINGLE . DAY. for 2 weeks straight—one day we had FIVE SHOWINGS! Great for selling a house, terrible for a mom with little kids. To prepare, I would strap my kids in the van in the driveway, start a video and then go back in and clean like a crazed woman, light scented candles and turn on some smooth jazz. True story. Anyhoo—I didn’t want to repeat THAT great parenting memory, so I hired people to do the scrubbing.
Turns out, we never put our house on the market, but I kept the cleaning ladies anyway. For a year. They did a nice job for the most part, but it was weird. They showed up at a different time each week. And because it was a cleaning service (not an individual) there were always strangers in my home and I had to keep leaving notes telling them (again) the specifics. The last few times they came, I found myself driving around the city, killing time with my 3-year-old all day long, only to go home and find out they hadn’t even been there yet. Seriously, I was gone for 6 hours doing NOTHING and they hadn’t arrived yet. Frustrating. I finally admitted to myself I could have been home cleaning my own house rather than wandering around Louisville. Darn. I hate when I get all practical.
2. After a year of having a gym membership and a personal trainer, I made the very easy decision NOT to renew my contract. I am probably a little too happy about this. Maybe because I’m tired of taking a shower and trying to look presentable to go work out. Maybe because in the time it takes to drive back and forth from the gym, I could have done a P90X DVD. Maybe because I never felt great about the decision to hire a trainer in the first place. Well, I did feel good about the trainer part, but somehow, the gym convinced me I needed a YEAR of training. I’m not always the sharpest crayon in the box, but I am quite frugal. And I happen to know quite a bit about fitness and exercise. So, why-oh-why did I agree to sign a binding contract stating I would work out with and PAY a trainer for an entire year? Drugs. I think they actually drugged me before I signed the contract. I couldn’t prove that in a court of law, so I dragged my butt to the gym 52 times to work out with Mr. Trainer. I am done. Like, SO done. Adios, Mr. Trainer.
3. As you can imagine, with all the firing of cleaning ladies and contracts expiring, our monthly budget just got very cushy. I see new hardwood floors in my future. Unless God pulls a “give to the poor” conviction. Which is very likely, because He does that sort of thing to me a lot.
4. I am really praying that the increased calorie burn of all the housework I am now doing will offset the decreased calorie burn of the personal trainer sessions. Fingers crossed.
5. Before we completely leave this subject, may I plead my case for the hardwood? I just finished potty training my youngest child. My house still has the original carpet (circa 1999). The original owner of the original carpet was a single, childless man. Guess what color carpet single, childless men choose when they build a home? White. I’ve been raising small children on white carpet for over six years. Peeing, pooping, puking and spilling children. That’s all I have to say about that. Feel free to intercede on my behalf concerning the floors.
6. Of course, with new hardwood, a kitchen upgrade would be nice. Don’t you think? Am I pushing it?
7. Totally shifting gears, I just landed a nice little writing gig. I will be a contributor to the parenting section of Blissfully Domestic. Which is kind of funny, when you consider I’m the same parent who strapped my kids in a van so I could clean my house. Please don’t tell them.
8. So, I’m reading through the entire Bible right now (I told you about the Bible-reading plan I’m using here) and I’m just amazed. There is a lot of dysfunction in the Old Testament. For the atheists and agnostics of the world who believe the Bible is completely contrived and fabricated so that people will believe in a contrived a fabricated God, I’ve gotta believe they’ve never read the Old Testament. I mean, who would make this stuff up?
Lot offers his virgin daughters to crazy-sexual men pounding on the door of his house?
Lot’s daughters get Lot drunk and sleep with him so they can have babies?
People stab fat (yes, it actually says that!) men through the gut and drive stakes through the heads of leaders?
Everywhere Abraham takes his wife Sarah, he lies and tells people “this is my sister.”
I would KILL Jon if he did that!
If my goal were to make something up so people would come and join my religion, I don’t think I’d include stories about deception, incest and murder. It’s not very inviting, ya know what I’m saying? It makes perfect sense to Christians, because we know God’s whole point is to seek out the losers of the world and give
them us hope and life. But how do atheists reconcile this, I wonder.
So, what is going on with YOU. Anything interesting? What’s going on this weekend? For Thanksgiving? How are the kids doing? How’s your love life? If you have hardwood floors, how do you like them? Talk to me!
I'm thinking that there may be a way to get the hardwood AND give to the poor. It just may mean a bit of saving up and waiting for the hardwood. In the meantime, professional carpet cleaning?
House cleaning stinks. I would love, love, love a housekeeper. Had one for a brief time, though, and actually mostly found myself frustrated. So yeah.
Yay on the writing gig! Yay, yay, yay! 🙂
New with me? Now THAT would be the definition of irrelevant. 😉
Oh I've missed you, Sandy. Love this post! Love your writing! Love YOU! (Especially the "I would KILL Jon if he did that to me" line!)
Me? I'm speaking at a women's retreat tomorrow. Battling the I-don't-want-to-do-this thing right now. Otherwise, everything is good. Busy. Fulfilling. Wonderful. Good.
Haven't had much blog reading time lately, but just got a moment and LOVED reading this post.
Saturday we are signing a 1 year lease on a vintage type apartment in Chicago . . . with hard wood floors. Not new ones, but I love them and a cool built in hutch. Yeah.( Our condo deal fell through.)
Hope to be all settled by Thanksgiving and will catch up more then.
PS. I know it is weird, but I love housecleaning.
Sarah was Abraham's 1/2 sister…still trying to decieve to save his own hide though.
I laughed all the way through this post. Too funny.
I'll vote for hardwood floors too. I would sooo love to have them. We're thinking about getting those "fake" laminated vinyl wood floors.
Hi Sandy, my goodness, what a funny story about sticking your kids in the car to watch a movie! I've moved once with two small children and would NOT sign up to do it again anytime soon!
Wanted to say that I just started reading through the entire bible as well!!! I'm using the chronological reading plan from the One Year Bible website…but feel the same was as you do and I'm only 5 days deep! There is some CRAZY stuff…like Noah getting drunk and being found by his sons naked in his vineyard?! (just blogged about that this morning!) I'm loving the reading and what I"m learning, but wish I had an expert nearby to explain some of these shenanigans to me!
Good luck! LOoking forward to hearing more about your reading!
I really hope you get the hardwood floors. I hear you with the white carpet. I have hardwood (well, laminate wood, anyway) downstairs and I am SO ready to put it upstairs, too.
I am also reading the OT and it's a bit hard to get jazzed about it right now. I've read through Jeremiah and am now in Ezekiel. So, let's see. God told him to tie himself up for 390 days. Then, this morning, God told him that he was going to take Ez's most treasured possession (his wife) to prove a point to Israel. Honestly, I'm glad I know how this whole Bible ends because if I wasn't a believer and didn't know Jesus, well…
So glad I'm reading the NT and Psalms as well. Oh and proverbs regularly makes me laugh. Today was the one about not being too cheery in the morning, lest you irritate your neighbor. Ha!
Oh! And I write for Blissfully Domestic, too. In the health section. Still need to come up with my article for this month!
Sandy…your post was hilarious! Honestly the best laugh I have had in a long time!
I would love for my son to read what you've written about Lot. My son says he's an atheist!!
Good luck with your hardwood floors…hmmm and kitchen upgrade! (yeah go for it!)
Haha, strapped the kids in the car so you could clean, love it! Great post, I love random.
I love the Bible and have read it 3 times through. When you make it through the deception, incest and murder you see the ultimate love story ever! To think we are the bride of the King and He is madly in love with us, gives me shivers.
Solution to your wants:
1) hire a student or recent grad looking for money to clean your house… you'll be doing two people a favor (you included)
2) go to your local fire station… those guys all do side jobs – installing hardwood floors may be someone's calling. These guys are the nicest and really do have a first job second to fire fighting.
As for my weekend… this 53 yr old is taking her first mission trip. Leaving for the Philippines tomorrow morning!
Thanks for your post.
How funny! You've given me an idea about the cleaning service, though. Not because I'm moving, but because I'm LAZY! And I'm a contributor at BD too! 🙂 Education. And I'm way behind on that just like I am on blogging and blog reading…you've nudged me! Now I have to think of an article to write this month!
Posts like this put a smile on my face:) (And on my typing, I guess:)
Prayers of intercession going up for your new hardwood floors. We got them 3 years ago after walking around on gross carpet that was getting so thin our joke was that soon we would walking on the sub-floor…and it might have been more comfortable.
Yes, house cleaning is NEVER done and takes so much time…..there's isn't anything really clever to add to this point 🙁
But I do think it burns ALOT of calories….I seriously work up a sweat at least once a day while vacuuming or floor scrubbing or running up and down stairs putting things away.
We used to go out for ice cream when our house was up for sale and being shown. Thankfully (this was years ago) it sold in less than a month….my waistline is thankful.
I'm reading thru the Bible and am currently reading Job. I know how it ends and love how honest the man was about his lamenting, but I have to admit it's a bit of a downer to start the day with. I usually flip over to the NT to find something a little more encouraging to start the day with. I remember VIVIDLY reading about the fat stabbing not too long ago…and was a little grossed out.
I think you should do a Friday catch-up more often…this is such fun!
Glad I dropped by today! Thanks for sharing your heart. I love your writing.
I am ok… Still unemployed and had a mild breakdown last Wednesday coz i thought "O gosh i am never gona have my dream wedding, children, move outa my mom's house. My dreams are D.E.A.D!"
But I'm trying hard to stay positive now.
I am learning to draw. Very nice and enjoying it. I am learning how to drive my scooter. VERY nice and really ENJOYING that!!
Gideon and i are ok. He's very supportive and encourages me to be positive and always makes me smile.
My dog is still my baby angel lol, my rabbit on the other hand has bitten a wound under her chin so due to my freaking out and throwing a toilet roll at her to chew on instead of her chin, G is taking care of the wound lol.
I'm going to be helping my mama out with interviews for a driver position by her work. She needs my counselling analysis lol so I'm excited for that too!!
That's all i can think of really. Yeah